Monday, May 4, 2009

Quick story: "Are You Ready?"

My brother has intimacy issues related to girls and doorsteps. He has a total block when he gets to the doorstep with a girl. He was on his 4th date with his current fixation and he was on her doorstep when he again could not pull the trigger on a liplock. I believe she said later that she was expecting it even. Instead he mumbled "I'm a wuss" and she heard. They then had a long embarrassing conversation(to him) regarding how he is an relationship idiot (my interpretation of the conversation, not his or hers) and then there was no payoff at the end, just an awkward hug.

They actually had a 5th date despite the end of the 4th date last weekend and he was going to pull the trigger on a kiss even if she denied him. The whole date his mind was bent toward that one purpose--getting a kiss at some appropriate time in the date. His mind was constantly analyzing and recalculating scenarios and probabilities during the date. Where would he be able to smoothly swoop in for a kiss? However, smooth and my brother go together like Shimano and Campagnolo--sure it is possible, but it is not a natural match. And like Campy and Shimano, my brother often needs some help, like a J-Tek shiftmate, to make something work. Without some help midway through the date, prospects for a kiss seemed to be dimming. My brother called our sister for some help during the date (seriously?), but the suggestion didn't pan out. Other hopeful scenarios failed as well.

Finally, after dinner, a motorcycle ride, and a movie at his place the opportunity seemed to be at hand. The movie was over and he had his arm around her. There was silence and they looked into each other eyes....he leans in and whispers... "Are you ready?"


"Am I ready for what?" she says. A total momentum killer, but he was already committed and he kissed her and she didn't slap him silly. It worked out OK, but seriously, what a line!

Are you ready?

I like it. It is my new slogan.


Kristin said...

LOL! Oh man, I think if I got that line I would be seriously scared!

Mr. Flynn said...

he is a total goof-ball. He felt like he needed an intro what he was going to do, but he didn't want to ask her if he could kiss her. Nor did he feel comfortable just going for it.

I was pretty much laughing so hard I was reduced to tears when he told me.